So, if you’ve been reading my blog a while, you probably remember the Lizard Sandwich episode.

If not, well… Here. Go read.

So tonight I reheated some leftovers, went into the den to watch “Once Upon a Time,” and then when the show was over I came back into the kitchen with my plate… to find a GIANT COCKROACH sitting INSIDE the leftovers container.

UGH!

Now, I’m not a huge fan of things dying, but cockroaches in my house are NOT OKAY. I yelled, and it ran…

Straight into the toaster oven.

Seriously, what is with things going into my toaster oven??

SO I got out the flyswatter and poked it and the thing SKITTERED (made the noise… I’m still shuddering just THINKING of it) and I chased it (using the flyswatter) around the toaster oven until it RAN OUT and then FLEW down onto the floor and headed STRAIGHT FOR ME.

At this point, I screamed like a little girl.

I’m not even exaggerating.

I shrieked so loud that I kind of scared myself. My neighbor is probably listening next door for banging sounds or something before he comes running, but I’m sure he heard me. I was LOUD.

And then I got the roach and flushed him down the toilet and dumped STRAIGHT VINEGAR on the floor where he’d been.

And now the toaster oven is ALSO getting covered in vinegar.

The wildlife here is the reason I have the CLEANEST TOASTER OVEN EVER.

[update]
Being the animal/nature geek I am, I actually looked up the species. Turns out this is an “American cockroach” (or Periplaneta americana) and that it measures (get this) an average of FOUR INCHES. That’s FOUR INCHES OF skittering little COCKROACH in my KITCHEN.

You’re welcome for THAT visual.

[update 1/30/12]
This morning I got up and am in the process of re-cleaning the toaster oven (for my own sanity, mostly). I also scrubbed and sterilized my teapots and (two hours after rising) am finally sitting down drinking my first cup of tea. A few minutes ago, Caspian came up to me and made his “Look, mom!” noise… the Gray Wonder just brought me ANOTHER ONE.

Guess what I’ll be spending the ENTIRE DAY DOING? (If you guessed clean the ENTIRE HOUSE then you are CORRECT!)